Monday, December 10, 2012

Monday Musings: &

It is time to reflect on some things that perplex me. First, I intend to offend no one. If you love any of the things listed below, please know that I love them too. But, I also find that faith is strengthened when questioned, so with that sublime premise, let us contemplate the ridiculous.

Perplexing Thing Number 1:

Why is the "ampersand" suddenly the new must have piece of typography art? I like to say "and" as much as the next person, and I love a good squiggly line, but, I don't get it. Even though I don't get it, I found myself seeing these everywhere and deciding the ampersand is cool. Um, why? Because people I think are cool said so. This desire to do as the cool people do has been my burden since I entered high school. Why stop now? I will probably end up with one of these on my wall. Damn you, poorly developed sense of self.

Perplexing Thing Number 2:

Why do I love a song that is essentially about date rape, or at the very least, coercion? Let's examine the evidence, shall we? I highlighted the important bits.
Baby It's Cold Outside (Elf Version, Of Course!)
So really I'd better scurry - Beautiful, please don't hurry
Well maybe just a half a drink more - Put some music on while I pour
Plying her with alcohol = first sign of foul play. 
 Say, what's in this drink - No cabs to be had out there
Um, roofies!!
I ought to say no, no, no, sir - Mind if I move closer 
She hasn't officially said "no" yet, but he's pushing his luck...
I simply must go - Baby, it's cold outside
The answer is no - Ooh darling, it's cold outside
This is getting serious. She has outrightly said "no," yet he does not back off. Where is Chris Hansen? I believe we've just caught ourselves a predator.
But don't you see - How can you do this thing to me?
 Oldest line in the book.
At least there will be plenty implied - If you caught pneumonia and died
Death threats!
Get over that hold out
Oh yeah. This is very convincing.

Disturbing right!? But, the Zooey Deschanel and Leon Redbone version? Amazing! Still going to love it.

Perplexing Thing Number 3: 

In some of the gifts guides I've been reading, people have recommended very fancy desk accessories like a calculator or a tape dispenser as a suitable holiday gift. No offense, but no one wants that. Even if it's made of antique copper. Even if it was crafted by a Himalayan artist who sources calculator parts from his mountainside farm. It's still a calculator.

What's on your mind this Monday?

images: 1 / 2 / 3 / 4 / 5

1 comment:

  1. I agree about the ampersand. I think it's for people who are not single to lord it over those of us who are. It's like a trophy. :)

    I've had the same thoughts about that song, but I love it so. And I agree about those gifts. If someone needs/uses a tape dispenser or stapler, they probably already have one. And lots of times, those "fancy" versions are more for looks than for utility.

    So then if you give up your trusty, ol' faithful Swingline for some bedazzled thing, you'll be irritated when the shiny thing doesn't work as well and papers need bindin'.