Monday, May 21, 2012

Monday Musings: To Do

Well, I have. 

But, this blog was an attempt to fix that. Many (gosh, I've lost count now) years ago, I started writing a novel. I was going full-steam ahead there for a while. I was in a writing group, I was working on it at the hair dresser, during whatever ten minutes of down time I could find, when I woke up in the morning before work. I had even cut down to part-time to pump that baby out. But, sadly, I moved to the West Coast...more on being married to an entrepreneur at another time. That move threw my creative juices for a loop. Actually it dried them up for a long time because all my energy was spent on hating the fact that I had to move: hating that I was away from my friends, my family, and a job I loved--a job that would let me work part time while working on my novel. 

So, almost nine months have passed, and I've gotten a grip. Part of getting back in touch with my writerly instincts was starting this blog. Yes, it is frivolous, and superficial, and all the things I was taught to throw over in pursuit of real art, and truth, and beauty (whatever that is), but it is a helluva lot of fun, and it gets me writing. While this is not literary by any stretch of the imagination, the act of fingers typing on a key board has reminded me that I love and adore writing in any form. Perhaps had I been writing more and grumbling less, I would have felt better all around and finished a book in the meantime.

For a long time I was in love with the idea of my book making it big, becoming a movie, and catapulting me onto an international book tour (on which I would, of course, have an entourage). I am sure that that is a kind of naivete able to be cultivated only by someone who has never actually tried to get anything published. But, it was a beautiful dream nonetheless. I'm over that now. I just want to finish it because I started it, and if no one reads it except my grandma, then who care? At least I can provide her with a little entertainment.

Some people say that writing a book is like giving birth; the finished product can be your legacy. The big difference is that once you're pregnant, you don't really have to do anything. Auto-pilot turns on, and poof!, nine months later, you put in a little work again, and you have a baby. (I suppose I am choosing to ignore the lifetime of work you put in after that glorious moment.) While a book might be a legacy, it requires work at every stage prior to its inception. Hard work. Focused work. Determined work, and disciplined work. Right now, I am running out of excuses. I am going to stop putting off being creative and I am going to get disciplined! This summer, I commit to finish this book.


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